Thursday, July 23, 2009

Wrap me up and call me slacker

Well...not really!

I mean, I've been very very busy since my last post waaaay back on the 27th of March.

Lots of things, but chiefly... I had a baby!

Along the way here's what i've learned since March 27:
PUPPS make your skin itch so bad that you'd cheerfully take to it with a Steelo.

All your obstatrician will do is look at them and say 'oh, are they still there are they? annoying.'
My chiropractor can work magic turning a breech baby.

Don't tell your husband how far apart your contractions are or he'll have you in hospital before you can say 'did my water break or am i just incontinent?'

Nothing is as comfortable as sitting on the toilet in labor.

At least until the wind changes direction and the rain comes in through the louvre window. Then perhaps it's time to tell you husband how close the contractions really are and hot foot it into hospital.

They expect you to *work* during your birthing time! Like, get up, walk around, do the hokey pokey. Visions of me having grapes peeled and reclining on a sofa GONE.

When you go to hospital, you can take all the blankets, lamps and teddy bears you like, but in the end you'll spend your twelve hours having face plant time with a pillow.

Hypnobabies is better than any drug in the known world.

Midwives don't believe you can be so relaxed in labor and tell you later they thought you were 'fluffing around'. FLUFFING AROUND MY ARSE!!! Did these women have any idea how long and hard i worked for two months to get myself to that state of catatonia without drugs? The hours of meditation, staring at my navel around the clock, and saying so many positive affirmations that I had enough for my own 365 day calendar.

I never expected labor to feel like such a beautiful journey that me and my little girl made together. I'm sure we'll never be as connected as we were for those twelve hours.

My friends really do love me.

My sister really is an angel.

No amount of breast feeding classes can prepare you for the real thing.
No amount of people saying 'ha ha, you won't sleep much now!' can prepare you for waking every four hours and wrangling with express pumps and nipple shields and hungry little bubbie.

No amount of 40 week pregnancies could prepare me for how much i love my little girl.

6 comments:

Mel said...

Now why does that cheeky cute peering over the blanket look remind me of her mum?

How could you not love such a cutie?

Robyn E said...

she is a cheeky thing. Refused to take the bottle off her dad this morning meaning i had to get up!

gabriellel66 said...

She's up to something there, I can just tell.

freya said...

She looks like she is going to smile.
Or vomit.
Or both.
50/50 bet.

Keziah Hill said...

Robyn! You clever thing! What's her name?

Matilda said...

She is tooooooo cute! Can't wait to see her (and you) again!